"him"

Nobody ever looked up to him. Nobody ever cared about him. He was so insignificant that people didn't even bother to use his name. Just him. He wasn't particularly scrawny, or nerdy, he just could not fit in and there was absolutely nothing he could do to change that. It's ridiculous, school politics is just ridiculous. Why do a bunch of adolescents have the right to decide who basks in the spotlight and who gets stepped on? As much as I did not want to get involved in the ridiculousness of it all, I felt for him, all the time. I didn't know him personally, I wasn't his best friend...and I don't know why I never changed that fact. While I was sandwiched between the popular kids and wallflowers with a couple of good friends, he was always alone. He dragged himself through corridors in silence with a blank face and empty eyes, even when low-life jocks shoved him into walls and insulted him for their own humour. People glanced but no one had the guts to do something. You could tell he was angry, but he was just hiding it, refusing to succumb to whatever was thrown at him. In fact, he was an intelligent guy - doing much better in classes than those who treated him like trash, that's for sure. I know I was rooting for him silently every time he got put down...I just don't know why I never broke my silence. Why do some people have it so bad? A kid like him sure as hell didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve to be degraded by ignorant snobs, and even worse, by people who should have protected him. Word just spread about him having abusive parents and people just used it against him, whether it was true or not. It was despicable, why didn't anyone stop it? Why didn't I stop it? No one ever thought he'd break like that. I feel absolutely useless asking these questions, anything anyone says or does now is absolutely useless.
Yesterday, he stepped on a chair, wrapped a belt strapped from the ceiling around his neck, and let go. And the guilt kills, every day since.